Nancy, out loud, pushing his glasses up his nose for him: I
said do you want to pick out my undies, I mean, my panties to wear tomorrow?
Ned: Ummm I got my own thanks.
Nancy: NO! For ME to
wear. To work. Do you want to go into our closet and riffle through my granny
panty basket-slash cat bed, pick out a pair, and I will wear them tomorrow?
Ned: Ummmm, WHY?
Nancy: I AM FLIRTING WITH YOU!!!!!
Middle Child: This is just weird.
Ned: (to middle child) Go watch t.v. in the living room. (to
Nancy) Not really.
Nancy: Why not? I
quote, 'If your husband picks out your panties he will be picturing you in
nothing but them-all day.'
Ned: Ummmm that really doesn't work that way. What are you reading?
Nancy: Pinterest. Sixteen Way to Flirt with Your
Husband. Would you prefer I leave you
sticky notes in unexpected places? Set up a cozy love nest for watching movies??
Middle Child: I WANT TO WATCH A MOVIE!
Ned and Nancy: LEAVE THE ROOM!!!!!
Middle Child: You guys are so weird.
Nancy: Kiss in the car at stoplights? Have a secret code
phrase like 'Are we due for an oil change'??? Grab some flesh???????
Ned: Why is it every time I go to read, you start talking?
Nancy: I'm flirting?
Ned sighed and turned back to his book.
Nancy repined homemade recipe cleaners and DIY rabbit cages.
In the morning, amidst a steamy shower a secret hidden
message appeared to Nancy on the bathroom mirror.
"We are due for an oil change...!"
Nancy smiled. And scribbled her own message into the mirror.
"Pin that!"